Daily Silly Status

If I could choose any one mythological creature to become alive & real, I`d have to pick…My girlfriend.

I just want to buy an old Mercedes Benz,so people will think I have been rich for a long time.

My moral compass must run on solar power because it never seems to work after dark.

Happy 4th of July ... U can toss out the Christmas tree now

Every pizza is a personal pizza, if you try hard and believe in yourself.

FACEBOOK STORY: Add as friend – Approve -> Write something on wall -Intro – Everyday chatting – Ask number phone – Messaging – Calling – Meeting – Express love – Make relationship status – Hangout – Misunderstanding – Fight – Break up – Unfriend – Block !THE END

Ok, I admit. Everything that`s wrong in your life is your fault.

three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere "Hold my purse."

Why does Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell insurance. Is there something dirty about insurance we should know about?

I don’t have time for the nervous breakdown I deserve.

My phone tried to autocorrect "f*cking" to "f*ck king," and I was like hell yeah I am.

eHarmony should be more like Amazon “customers who slept with Tina172 also slept with LuvinLife_83, TaintMisbehavin, and Cat_Lover03?.

Girl: I have changed my mind. Boy: Thank God! Does the new one work?

You never know how little self control you have until they put chips and salsa in front of you at a Mexican restaurant.

I’m not a sore loser ... thanks to Vicodin.