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Woah.. the room is spinning.. I knew the world revolved around me.. ;)
You should probably first master the art of thinking “inside” the box
Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone.. and if I do, I’ll tell them not to tell anyone.
Just told the guy at the second drive-thru window that the guy at the first drive-thru window wants to fight him.
Thank you Super Bowl for reminding all Americans how bad we really are at understanding Roman numerals
That weird moment when u just say "what`s up " to someone and they thing you`re a shrink.
"What doesn`t kill you makes you smaller." -Super Mario
Cool things about being a turtle: 1. Born with a free house attached to you 2. Super chill 3. Could potentially mutate into a ninja
You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.
Hey people who say I am boring and not interesting; FYI the police just called saying they want to talk to me because I am "a person of interest"
I`m sorry, all I hear is your perfume
To be honest, I´m just fishing for compliments tonight.
ready for bed - gunna give my sheets some arse and my pillows head;]
Alcohol doesn`t get people drunk, people get people drunk. Drunk people get other drunk people extra drunk.
Have you noticed that the "lol" symbol looks like a drowning guy? i bet hes not laughing out loud