Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
People who text back... "kk" ... Are so annoying! ....and almost racist
Those friends who like and at the same time unlike my statuses please you`re increasing my blood pressure!
I give 2 star movies 5 stars on Netflix because if I sat through this piece of sh!t, I want you to as well.
Saying, "We need to talk," is the most efficient way to freak someone out
There’s always that one person that catches you doing something weird.
So you constantly feel sorry for yourself and feel the need to tell everyone all about it. I can’t imagine why he left you.
I do 5 sit ups daily. It might not sound like much, but there`s only so many times you can hit the snooze button.
what is the first thing a homeless person does when he`s on a computer? he searches through the recycle bin
With great power comes great electricity bill.
Ever look in a mirror wondering about the stranger staring back & then realize it`s your neighbor`s window and they`re calling the cops?
Lower your expectations and I will totally amaze you.
One day id like to have a brand new Iphone like the lady in front of me with the food stamps.
Born free. Now, I’m expensive.
People keep thinking that I care ... Wierd.
Slipped on black ice today, I thought it was regular ice at first, but when I stood up, my wallet was gone.