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Finally got my Bon Jovi Sat Nav working... Wooahh we`re half way there.
I would explain it to you again, but I am fresh out of puppets and crayons.
Honestly, it`s not the way I look that reveals my age. It`s my use of complete sentences, proper grammar and spelling when I text.
The only time I`ve ever early to anything is when I`m dropping my kids off to be watched by somebody else.
Self-Checkout lanes were invented by a guy who was sent out to buy tampons.
If the world dosen`t end on the 21st, I sure do have a lot of MREs to gift wrap.
That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is “act natural, you’re innocent”.
You know when you’re exercising and feel like you could keep going and going? That’s happening to me, only with beer.
It`s ok to admit when you`re wrong. Just don`t tell anyone.
Do athletic people not know about Netflix?
How easily you`re offended is directly proportional to how dumb you are.
"Hey bro shotgun this beer" No I don`t drink "You wanna be cool don`t you?" I don`t drink "C`mon NERD!" Grandma PLEASE stop
I get butterflies in my stomach every time I eat butterflies.
:): The Bipolar smiley face
I wish all these vegetarians would stop eating my food´s food!