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Beauty comes in all shapes & sizes. Small, large, circle, square, thin crust, thick crust, stuffed crust, extra toppings.
The easiest way to get over someone is with a steamroller.
I`m a Leader not a follower. Unless it`s a dark place...then you`re going first!
Lady`s if you want guys to look at your face instead of your chest ... eat a banana.
My favorite thing about marriage is sharing a house with the person most likely to murder me.
People with jobs: It`s Friday!!! People without jobs: It`s Friday?
Thinking about staying in tonight? Nobody looks back in life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep.
I’m not the kind of person you ever put on speaker phone.
If you watch Jurassic Park backwards, it`s an uplifting film about dinosaurs and people who work together to rebuild an island.
I went on two diets because there wasn’t enough food on just the one.
The best trick the devil ever pulled was calling herself "him".
If i had a dollar for everytime i was thinking about you, i would start thinking about you.
I sent off for some information on my family tree. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested it would be in my best interest that I just start over.
I`m trying to give up sexual innuendos. But it`s hard........so hard......
If I lived everyday like it was my last, the body count would be staggering.