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A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
I know I have a long way to go but look at how far I`ve come.
My eye problems starts on Mondays and ends on Friday evening. I see clearer after the fourth bottle.
I watched Americas Got Talent for 15 minutes and I beg to differ.
I`ll act my age when I`m 69..
I don`t hate you, but if you we`re drowning, I would dive in and handcuff a piano to your neck.
I’m always frank with my sexual partners. Don’t want them knowing my real name.
I’m amazing in bed. I have the ability to stay there all day.
My love is like a candle, If you forget about me, I`ll burn your frikin house down!
I read an article the other day that said if you drink every day you are an alcoholic. Thank God I only drink every night.
Can you imagine the reaction 20 years ago if you showed people a photo album filled with pictures you took of yourself in the bathroom?
Had another daydream where I`m doing the mexican hat dance and CIA guys watching me from satellites are dancing along in their control room
"I want to be cuddled, but I want to be alone. Being crazy is hard." - WOMEN
I think I`m funny - but looks aren`t everything
The biggest lie I tell myself is: “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”