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Live today like it`s your last!! But pay your bills and use a condom just in case it isn`t.
" I don`t watch much tv" proudly says a person who spend 8 hours a day on the internet.
Call me faithless, but I just can`t believe three guys would travel that far on camels to throw a baby shower.
I met a girl who told me that she broke up with her last boyfriend because he just didn`t work out. Which is when I knew, she wasn`t the one for me, as I hate to work out as well.
Asking a girl what exactly she looks for in a guy is like asking her "what exactly do I have to do to get friendzoned?
I`m just a boy...standing in front of a girl...asking her to lov.....aw who am I trying to fool. I just want in your pants.
and alcohol are now friends.
If you`ve ever wondered which of your friends are really amazing, you`re in luck today. :)
Guys I can`t be leave I`m sharing this with you, but I saw my self on TV. After I turned it off.
I liked your facebook update, only so I can unlike it.
I`ve accidentally swallowed a load of scrabble pieces.........My next poop could spell trouble.
A word to the wise ain`t necessary - it`s the stupid ones that need the advice.
I`m so out of shape, Internet Explorer could probably run faster than me.
I was the only one that cared when Jimmy cracked corn.
I saw a guy walking 4 dogs this morning and thought, Wow!.. That guy must be really blind.