Daily Silly Status

I`ve had frozen pizza and delivery pizza in the same day, b!tch you don`t know me.

Finally got my Bon Jovi Sat Nav working... Wooahh we`re half way there.

My girlfriend would be so mad if she found out that I`m telling people she`s my girlfriend.

I`m not lazy I just really enjoy doing nothing!!

I enjoy long walks away from responsibility.

They have all those non-smoking laws in public places so let’s now all focus on passing some perfume/cologne usage limits.

There has to be an online course that I can take to get over my internet addiction.

When I said I missed you, I meant with a hammer.

The most amazing thing about the internet is how it allows you, with the click of a few buttons, to do absolutely nothing with your life

I`m so sick and tired of my friends who can`t handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me three time while carrying me to the car.

I took a nude photo of myself ... With the light off ... You`re welcome.

CPR is the human version of blowing in to a video game cartridge hoping it`ll work again.

I thinking about how im disgusted by holding a gas pump but yet, I have no problem drinking my beer from a cup that ten other people drank out of, and a backwash covered ping pong ball was just thrown into it after hitting a dirty a$$ garage floor??

Life would be perfect if: Mondays were fun, junk food was healthy, drama didn’t exist, and goodbyes were only until tomorrow.

I just had Déjà vu...and you were an asshole both times.