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Relax,,, We`re all crazy.. It`s not a competition.
Remember kids, the Toys R Us bankruptcy and liquidation teaches us that poor spelling and grammar will always catch up with you eventually.
I hope to get to the point in my life where I`m not excited about finding change on the ground.
If one goes to online college, do they have to haze them self?
Did you know that doughnuts make your clothes shrink?
Shout out to all the ladies at church today in the same clothes from the club last night.
We Should Have A Way Of Telling People Their Breath Stinks Without Hurting Their Feelings. Like: "I`m bored, let`s go brush our teeth"
Hey sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come.
Today everything gets answered by the magic eight ball
Show me on the back of your mini van window where your life went wrong.
For many people, "live and learn" is one task too many.
Isn’t it funny how people that talk too much also have annoying voices?
Just called my own voicemail and left messages until the memory was full. People can`t leave messages now. That`s the kind of genius I am.
"I’m definitely going to do that tomorrow.” — Me being delusional
I have blank business cards I hand out and call them my “none of your business” cards.