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Give Me A Minute While I Pretend To Care!
The only time I want to hear about your baby is when you tell me it ain`t mine.
How could a man who is covered in tattoos be afraid of commitment?
I dont know whats more awkward, answering Dora, or sitting in silence while she stares at you.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said bet you can`t hit me with a quarter!
I`m gonna surprise my hand with some sex tonight!
You can`t Febreze bullshit.
Don’t let anyone push you around. Unless it’s in a wagon because that might actually be fun.
Mom in poetic mood ....Asked me to express emptiness .... I showed her my wallet ........ n m cheek still burns .... :-p :-p
I wonder if Earth makes fun of the Moon for having no life.
You dont know sh!t about pressure until you`re the only Black person on the dance floor while white people clap & form a circle around you
You`ve cat to be kitten me right meow.
I wish there was a room where we could go and see all the stuff we have ever lost.
I love watching women`s beach volleyball. There have been two wrist injuries so far, but I should be ok by next week.
Why does the sound of the recliner opening always remind my wife the trash needs to be taken out?