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They’re called scents, not flavors, I should not able to taste your perfume or cologne.
You guys know that there are things higher than kites, right?
"Probiotic" sounds a lot better than "bacteria infested"
You might be addicted to Facebook if you read my post`s every day...
"mommy watch this!" is the toddler equivalent of "hold my beer and watch this"
I`m the crazy bitch you`ll never forget.
You never see a church with free wifi. I guess because no church wants to compete with an invisible power that actually works.
Settle down joggers at red lights, settle down.
Remember this when you are drunk: You can`t fall off the floor.
they say money cant buy you happiness but id much rather be crying in a fararri...
If adult diapers are called Depends, then baby diapers should be called Definitely!!
When I see a tire swing swaying gently in the breeze, I like to believe its daydreaming about life on the open road.
I put the b!tch in the kitchen.~ last thing I remember saying before I woke up in the hospital.
If I ever get off this couch, I’ll be unstoppable.
Before social networking you could just completely forget someone existed and it was....GREAT!