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Any psycho girls wanna hang out? Just text me like 5000 times and let me know.
I`ve been holding my stomach in for 3 years now so don`t talk to me about dedication
wants my 260 FB friends to know I love you all..except #193
Exercise makes you look better naked. Alcohol does the same, you pick..
I`m not the type of person you want to put on speaker during a phone conversation.
Dont you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?
Hockey: because running on knives makes sense.
Mister Rogers didn’t adequately prepare me for the people in my neighborhood.
No one answers their phones anymore... If I ever get arrested, I don`t want a damn phone call, I want a facebook posting.
I really hope my spirit animal is a bear because well I would love to hibernate all winter.
You`re more inbred than sandwhich filler.
Sometimes I listen to strangers conversations and mentally give my opinion
“I don’t watch TV” proudly says a person who spends 8 hours a day on the internet.
I recently added squats to my workouts by moving the beer into the bottom shelf of the fridge.