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My friend works at the morgue and apparently tonight is open mike night.
My boss told me to have a good day so I went home.
Just knowing that I have successfully pissed you off again makes my day.
I don`t lift so maybe I`m wrong about this, but I feel like Popeye might be focusing on his forearms too much.
I hope Breaking Bad ends with Jesse waking up from a dream in the middle of Mr. White`s chemistry class.
It turns out that playing strip solitaire isn`t nearly as much fun as playing strip poker. Especially at work...
The first rule of the OCD Club is to have a second rule so there is an even number of rules.
I really want to talk to you about how I don`t want to talk to you.
I wish I loved anything as much as rappers love female dogs and gardening tools.
Maybe one day a loooong time ago a kid decided to play hide and seek with his pet Bigfoot but just didn`t explain the game properly.
There is no such things as ghosts. I know, I asked Santa Claus
I`m so fresh they call me "ferbreeze"
Every time I almost think humanity will be okay, I see someone struggle with the self-checkout for 20 minutes.
is ready to have one too many!
Drop it! Please, just DROP IT. - My dog, whenever I`m eating.