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People who don`t know what they want should not use the drive thru!
Got kicked out of the hospital. Apparently the “head nurse” is just the one in charge of the other nurses.
Life is full of disappointments, I`ll just add you to the list.
Logging in to Facebook has become the equivalent of opening the fridge door and staring inside even though you`re not hungry.
I was in a taxi and the driver said "I love my job. I`m my own boss and nobody tells me what to do!" I said "That`s really great, now take a left here."
If love is blind....why is lingerie so popular?
Her (from the living room): What time is it out there? Me (in the kitchen): Same time as it is in there.
Found a baby snake in my backyard while mowing. Long story short, I don`t have to mow anymore since my yard is on fire.
She likes to call it a conversation, but mostly she`s gathering evidence.
my phone battery lasts longer than relationships this days !
Do people who exercise not know about ice cream and Netflix?
All i ever see on facebook is LBR, TBH, LMS, and all that other crap...
Porn & love songs. Destroying reality forever.
Like a good neighbor, stay over there
You know that old saying? If you seen one woman naked. You want to see all women naked.