Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Love is like Wi-Fi, you can`t see it, but you know when you`ve lost it.
Telling someone they shouldn`t be sad because others have it worse is like telling someone they shouldn`t be happy because others have it better.
If your house doesn`t have house numbers on it, you need to address that situation.
Ladies, when it comes to stalking, I`m 100% behind you.
Women say they love a man in uniform but when i go clubbing in my McDonalds uniform none of them will talk to me....I`m confused
Did you hear that? That was the sound of soccer being irrelevant in the US for another 4 years..
Why do they call it "hiring a hitman" and not "ordering takeout"
Today I met one of those people on the bus that gets all pissed off when you put your finger in their mouth when they yawn.
Hold boobs not grudges.
I should never have climbed into this vat of curdled milk. I`m in whey over my head.
If the wicked witch of the west melts in water ... How did she bathe?
The well behaved rarely make history.
I live for those really small but special moments in life, like when I see the waiter bringing my food to the table.
My therapist goes to her therapist five minutes after I leave.
People ask me why I don`t have tattoos. Seriously, would you put a bumper sticker on a Lambourghini?