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My resolution last year was to learn Spanish, and that only lasted about dos weekos.
To be truthful from deep down ... I don`t believe that paper beats rock.
Why do men fart more than women? Because women can`t shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
The length of your "About me" section on Facebook is directly proportional to how annoying you are in real life.
I had been dreaming about eating a giant marshmallow, when I woke up my pillow was gone! :O
The first snow of spring is always the most beautiful
Thank you Pringles for being the only chip company that doesn`t sell air.
We get it people on Facebook. You`re married, you have kids, you`re happy. Calm down.
"Never pick a fight with an ugly person. They`ve got nothing to lose." -Robin Williams
When I die I`m going to go to heaven and God is going to be like nope, remember what you said on Facebook
Going to the skate park to watch people fall.
According to my roommate`s diary, I have boundary issues.
Somewhere, right now.. One of my Facebook friends is already drunk!
Kinda funny how the Mayans said we were all gonna die in 2012, but they all disappeared way before us.
It must be exhausting being offended by everything.