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Sometimes I`m completely inconsiderate to other peoples feelings. And other times I`m asleep.
I`m not mature enough to be in a yoga class.
As long as there is an open textbook in front of you, nobody will question what you are doing on your laptop.
"You drive me to drink!!!" ~Me shouting to the taxi driver.
I bet it’s pretty hard at a mime’s funeral to figure out when the moment of silence is over.
Very productive day today, turd-wise
The first sign of laziness:
I got my stomach by doing as many crunches as I can everyday. Usually either Nestle or Captain
A court date is still technically a date, right?
New Life Goal: Get a job where people ask me, "You actually get paid for doing this?"
Took my 3rd self-defense class, so if anyone feels like attacking me straight on, very slowly, w/ a fake knife in their right hand, BRING IT
I`m so, so sorry I started the whole Facebook Is Going To Start Charging thing. I didn`t think it would go THIS far..... sorry
You know you had an interesting day when your Google search history includes "rubber panda".
Didn`t have to do much to end my last relationship...she first told me that "opposites attract"...then a couple of days later she told me i was handsome, kind, smart, funny and loving...
I always learn from the mistake of others who take my advice.