Daily Silly Status

I suspect the ancient Greeks would be horrified that we refer to `laying on a couch all weekend watching a TV series` as a "marathon"

If you try and don´t succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

Hey Samsung and Apple, no need for commercials. We’ve all chosen sides.

I’ve had no formal martial arts training, but I know for a fact the Power Rangers are wasting too much energy on unnecessary summersaults

Sit-ups are my favorite form of exercise because I get to lay down every few seconds.

I`m not a Dr. or a Nutritionist, but I`m pretty sure the worst thing you can put into any high fat/ high calorie dish is your fork.

Sometimes I think my job is actually a hidden-camera game show where they see how much absurd bullsh!t I`ll put up with before I catch on.

You don’t have to be naked to have a good time, but it helps.

I dreamt that was dreaming, and then someone woke me up and told me I was dreaming but it turned out I had only dreamed that so I went back to sleep in my dream, all upset that my dream that I was dreaming was interrupted by another dream....hahahahaha.....whoa, need to lay off the Red Bull.

Hey,,,, I said I`d be there in 10 minutes... Quit calling me every half hour.

Karma means I can rest easy at night knowing all the people I treated badly had it coming.

This is odd?!?! The hour we lost this weekend was the one when I was planning to go to the gym.

Getting that beach body is easy. You just have to know where to dig.

Dear Lord, Thanks for making me funny. Especially since you didn`t give me much else to work with.

I`m having an out of money experience.