Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m sorry I slapped you. It`s just you seemed like you weren`t going to stop talking and I panicked.
The hardest part of having multiple kids is explaining why only your first child has a baby book.
I always tell my kids that it`s ok to make mistakes as long as you learn how to blame them on other people.
Hang out with different people everyday so the only person who knows you`ve been wearing the same outfit all week is you.
( )( ) =( `-` )= <( . )> ("`)("`) bunny!!
If I could bring one dead person back to life I`d bring back Walk Disney. Just to show him the shows on Disney channel and see his reaction..
This hangover feels like... I should take a shot.
Give a man a fish & he`ll eat for a day. Give a man a jelly fish and you can pee on him.
Dont you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?
Iām planning on ringing the new year in with a kiss ... whether my dog likes it or not.
I want you to know that whatever problems you`re having, I`m here to read about it on Facebook
I`ve been repeating the same mistakes in life for so long now I may as well call them traditions.
I hate brushing my teeth at night. It signifies I can`t have any more food and I`m never ready for that kind of commitment.
Next on SportsCenter: Where is Tim Tebow watching the Super Bowl and how will that impact the game?
The only difference between McDonald`s and my work is McDonald`s has only got one clown running the show.