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I shook the vending machine until my chips fell, so yeah, I’m a hunter-gatherer.
Here`s an idea...You go away and I`ll stop ignoring you.
Be careful, there is also plenty of mentally unstable fish in the sea.
Summer is real cool until every f*ckin type of insect comes out of the 8th circle of hell.
What doesn`t kill you makes you stronger. Except for bears. Bears will kill you.
Women aren’t that complicated. They just want an honest and genuine guy who will give them insincere compliments they might not deserve.
I hate it when people are holding a device capable of using google and they ask me stupid questions.
The only person whom a woman listens carefully & follows sincerely & does exactly as he says is a photographer
Some people just lack the ability to realize that everyone in the room wants them to shut up.
If I had to describe myself in one word it would be "doesn`t know how to follow directions."
Don`t be ashamed of who you are. That`s your parents job.
Sometimes, I don`t know how I`m going to get through the day. Then I remember: I have beers waiting for me at home. I can do this for them
If you don’t like my sense of humor please tell me… so I can laugh at you!
If my grandmother were alive today, I`m pretty sure she`d still have her blinker on.
Sneezing when you pee is only recommended when you`re in a public toilet.