Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
How do you play religious roulette? You stand around in a circle with your friends and blaspheme, and see who gets struck by lightning first.
I don`t have any "driving the speed limit" music.
My internet went down for about 5 minutes earlier....so I talked to my family.....they seem like nice people!
I hate to choose sides, but if forced, I`ll aggressively side with the person paying my bar tab.
llllllloooollllll...........................i saw a donkey on a bike
If a Jehovah`s Witness dies and goes to heaven...does God hide behind the pearly gates and pretend he`s not in?
If a man repeats everything a woman says, word for word,,,,,,,, is he still wrong?
Have the people who designed wine glasses ever washed dishes in their lives?
My grandma told me her joints are getting weaker, so I told her to roll them tighter.
That sounds fried. I`ll take it.
Here`s a list of things I need you to accomplish without any resources to do them with. -management
I’m not surprised you’re having problems I had a bad experience with your reality once too.
People says nothing is imposible.. But i do nothing everyday!!
These bar stools are creaky!! [continues to fart on first date]
Don`t sweat the petty things and don`t pet the sweaty things.