Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My gift horse is facing the wrong way
A pessimist thinks that all women are sluts. An optimist hopes that they are.
i don`t care if u don`t like me ........... i am not a facebook status:D
I don`t have to run faster than the lion, I just have to run faster than you.
We`re all brave until we realize the cockroach has wings
Where there`s a will I want to be in it
I`m honestly convinced some women do not fart. They just hold it in, and it comes out as drama.
My motto is "Never say never." Which makes it difficult to tell people my motto...
Some old people are driving vehicles right now and don’t even know it.
Just once I want my boss to assume I`m tired in the morning because I fight crime all night, not because of all the booze I drank.
By the time I’ve said “Nice to meet you” I’ve already forgotten your name.
People keep thinking that I care ... Wierd.
For just once in my life I want my phone to ring and for someone on the other end to ask if I`m on a `secure line`
When you are not happy and would like to go back to being young, think of Algebra!
You can’t please everyone, so you might as well just concentrate on me.