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I`m not a psychologist,,, but I remember when a Hot Wheels track magically cured 80% of ADHD
At least men and women agree on one thing, they both donβt trust women.
I found out why I`m still single. Apparently, you have to go outside and let people see you.
This pill bottle says `Take with plenty of fluids` and `Don`t take with alcohol`. That doesn`t even make sense
Was disappointed when I watched the films Shaft, XXX, X-Men, In To Deep, Snatch, The Box, Free Willy. None of them were what I expected...
Patience Is When Playing TETRIS And U Let Those Bricks Fall On Their Own Without Speeding Them Down
I guess today has been pretty good. I haven`t had to slap one single person yet....
Anyone else think there should be a sarcasm font?
After the doctor left the exam room from my prostate exam. The nurse came in with three words I didn`t want to hear. "Who was that?"
Wow, I haven`t seen you since the last time I wish I hadn`t seen you
Relationship status: Are you gonna eat that?
Today I caught myself thinking of you and smiling... but it was because you had a booger in your nose the last time I saw you.
Dear Autocorrect, She`s an amazing woman not an amazon woman. Thanks. And now I`m never getting laid.
Your girlfriend is rated E... For Everyone
Every pizza is a personal pizza if you eat the entire thing.