Daily Silly Status

"There`s nothing sexier than a chick that knows how to work on cars" -Dudes, trying to get us to do that job too.

I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, `13...13....13...13.` The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks and looked through to see what was going on. Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick. Then they all started shouting. `14...14...14...14....

I wish my car was fueled by my lack of desire to go to work.

I act like Pacman at parties. I walk around the room eating everything in site and avoiding everyone.

I`m leaving my body to science because even scientists need a good laugh now and then.

It`s a good idea to test your immune system from time to time by eating a gas station hot dog

In every organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.

I was filling out this form when one of the questions asked "What level is your maturity?" I didn`t fill it out cause I couldn`t find my crayons!!

I think New York has reached the point where it can finally be called York.

Whenever I drive past the psychic’s empty parking lot, I think, if I was psychic I would only be open on the days I knew people were coming.

for every like, I will fart on my wife face

A blind man walks into a bar....and a stool....and a table....

I bought a screwdriver bit for my electric drill. It`s useful for converting ordinary phillips screws into non removable screws.

It`s weird how many people at my office are named "Hey."

If nobody comes from the future to stop you, how bad can the decision really be?