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You`re only limited by your own imagination! And money. And talent. And genetics. And time. And other people. Go for it!
Warning: this life contains strong language, adult situations and nudity.
Told my kids next time I take their electronics away I`d also be responding to all texts they receive. They`ve been well behaved since.
A fairy godmother but for breakups. She takes your phone and leaves alcohol and possibly your first cat.
4 out of 5 dentists agree that 1 out of 5 dentists is just doing it for the attention.
I honestly have a fear that one day I`ll leave my house and not be wearing any pants!
Your name should be Gelette because you`re the best a man can get
There`s a sucker born every minute, but swallowers are harder to find.
Every night before bed I do this cute little thing where I stare at the Internet for 6.5 hours
Just found out my birthday is the same day I was born... Life is crazy...
I`m 0-9 on finding secret rooms behind bookcases.
Do the people inside mascot costumes also smile when they have their photos taken?
Who called them fake potatoes and not imitaters.
If you wake up with a chick and you dont know her name, take her to starbucks, they`ll write it on the cup.
I could actually watch golf on TV if Land Mines were involved.