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I downloaded this app called "Hide & Go Seek". Ever since then I cant find my damn phone.
“Let me rephrase this question so I can get pissed off at you all over again.” - WOMEN
I wonder if more children were conceived because of alcohol or more alcohol was consumed because of children.
Your secret is safe with me as long as it`s boring.
I was just awarded the first place trophy for laziness. All I need now is for someone to accept it on my behalf.
Accidentally used AOL.com, I betting the employees there are celebrating and think they have a sure future.
sorry but your password must contain an "uppercase letter, a number, a haiku, a gang sign, a hieroglyph, and the blood of a virgin"
is easily distracted by shiny objects.
My wife hasnt stopped looking through the window since it started raining. If it gets worse, I might have to let her back in...
is having some serious PMS: Parked Motorcycle Syndrome!
You haven`t truly made it on YouTube until someone recognizes you in the unemployment line and asks for your autograph.
okay it was me..... I did it ..... I let the dogs out
Just witnessed kids playing tag. What is this world coming to? Do their parents know they are outside, interacting, and getting exercise?
Light beer and turkey bacon probably won`t kill you but why take the chance??
I prefer to think outside the box because things can get very dark inside it.