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I wouldn`t mind being alone with my thoughts, if I didn`t know them all so well.
Sh!t`s spiraling out of control and I`m all like "wheeeee."
The amount of people who confuse "to" and "too" is amazing two me.
Fun Fact: Even though they call it a "man hole", you can shove women and children down it just fine.
My advice for pretty much anything that`s broken is "did you try and jiggle it?".
One out of every 4 Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they´re okay, then it´s you.
You`ve been on more hotel pillows then chocolate mints.
Not sure what my spirit animal is, but I am sure it has rabies
We played a lot of "Keep The Balloon In The Air" as kids, a game known to most other people as being poor.
That first kiss in the morning is so special, and the dog enjoys it too.
I just wanted to send you a quick note letting you know that you`re in my inappropriate thoughts.
The girl at the Taco Bell drive thru gave me this “I know your high” look. I snatched my 37 crunchy tacos and got out of there.
Remember, time is more powerful than You!!! One tree makes a million matchsticks......But when the time comes........Only 1 match stick is needed to burn a million trees......
I had a wet dream about you last night. Yeah, I was drowning you in a lake.
I want to sleep tighter