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They say love is more important than money. I`d like to see them go and try to pay their bills with a hug.
In some ways I’m just like a dog…. I can’t be trusted around unsupervised food.
If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.
Some idiots actually sold their homes and properties thinking the world was really going to end! What losers. I hope my boss gives me my job back on Monday
Some day I wanna be "change my oil every 3000 miles" rich!
Today is National I Don`t Feel Like Doing Sh!t Day. Celebrate accordingly.
Oh cool! ... I really do not care.
Don`t think I didn`t notice that you deleted your status when no one Liked it.
Theme parks can snap a clear picture of you on a rollercoaster at 70mph, but bank cameras can`t get a clear shot of a robber standing still.
Life tip: if someone comes out of a bathroom sweating, do not go in that bathroom.
I went somewhere earlier and saw a frog parked illegally and the poor thing got toad!!
Just another day of not being rich and famous.
~WARNING~ I will more than likely offend you at some point in time
The weather is so nice. I think I’ll go outside and watch other people run.
i made a chicken salad the other day. little bastard didn`t even eat it.