Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
"That`s crazy" is the perfect response when you haven`t been listening.
Omg!! got 6 numbers on the Lotto.. and the stupid machine didn´t pick any of them
I wonder if more children were conceived because of alcohol or more alcohol was consumed because of children.
To all my friends who post Controversial, Obscene, Dirty, Offensive, and Derogatory posts, .. Keep that sh!t up. I like it....
I love you more than I hate everyone else.
10 years ago Facebook came in to our lives forever changing our ability to judge each other from our couches.
Been there, done that. Hypothetically
To understand paranoid people better, follow them around. Observe them. Write down notes.
I would not mind living next to a serial killer. They never kill the neighbor. He`s the one that`s always on the news later saying "He was a quite guy, never really talked to anyone." Wait a minute ... I don`t talk to my neighbors!
Tried to text "playa" but it changed it to "player" I must have the white iPhone.
I love sleeping, but I never want to go to bed early.
I`m not interested in anything that requires 5 hours of energy.
Tonight I`m playing hard to get off the sofa.
Sexual education classes in school should just be listening to a baby cry for 5 hours straight while watching the same cartoon on repeat.
The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it”