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I saw a fat kid sitting on a seesaw all by himself. I stopped and waited for another kid to fall from the sky. I left disappointed.
If a girl can kick your a$$ at video games, she’s a keeper.
I hide from people too, so I get it bigfoot, I get it.
Who the hell invented Bull Riding? "Hey, I`m gonna hop on that 2,000 pound pissed off animal...Time me!!!"
I hope your day is as nice as your butt.
Do you know how many poisonous apples I`d have to give out before I was considered to be the fairest in the land?
I just apologized to my wife for something she did wrong. Marriage is fun.
There should be an energy drink named 6 AM child
“I don’t know why people dislike jury duty. I think being able to play god with others’ lives sounds fun!” – How I got out of jury duty
Apparently you can not demand to be strip searched.
Screw doing situps...teddy bears don`t and everyone loves them.
tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes
So does screaming at my son in Chuck E. Cheese because he won`t share his game tokens with me make me an evil person? Just kidding! I have no clue whose kid this is.
Please be careful on the roads. Lots of people are drinking exsessively and letting their wives drive.
If zombies attack the world, everyone will run and hide. Except for us gamers, of course. We`ve been waiting for this all our lives!