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You guys ever trip out on the fact that Indian people eat Indian food for breakfast?
Today I will kick a$$, and make dreams happen...but first, Coffee.
Mom: How are your grades this semester? Me:.... Mom:.... Me: Mother what`s important is that we have our health
I wonder if the clouds ever look down on us and say "Hey look! ...that one`s shaped like an idiot!"?
It`s so nice to come home and relax with Facebook after a long day at the office being on Facebook.
FYI: You have to stop Facebook posting to have an alibi for ignoring texts.
If I`m guilty of anything, it`s loving too much. And several outstanding speeding tickets. But mostly loving too much.
Why do guys cheat on pretty girls with ugly ones...?
The synonym for `reality` is `offline`
Life is like a bowl of soup; you only get blown if you`re hot.
Man I wanna throw a book at someones face and be like "I Facebooked you!"
Peppermint schnapps might seem like a ridiculous drink, but nobody at work ever complains about my breath.
No need to blind fold me, just hand me my phone and drive, I won`t have a clue how to get back here
Lets just skip the fight and go right to the make-up sex.
That awkward moment when you forget what you’re watching during the commercial break.