Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Who the hell is Pete, and why do we do things for his sake?
The real reason I`m not a superhero.... Pockets, I need my pockets.
"It`s the little things in life that make you laugh," my mom used to say. I never understood it until I saw two midgets fighting at Walmart.
Don`t be sad laundry, nobody`s doing me either.
Zebras are just horses that escaped from prison.
No matter how little I do in a day. I always feel like I could have done less.
In a parallel alternate universe, my cat and my dog have jobs and I chill at home.
The worst thing about parallel parking is witnesses...
How to tell if your wife is mad at you - Step 1. She is
I`m so broke right now that if someone tried to rob me, they`d just be practising..
This jar of peanut butter says "may contain nuts" on it. Remember when survival of the fittest was a thing? Good times.
Dear piece of paper that wont go in the dust pan ... f*ck you!
Tried to text "playa" but it changed it to "player" I must have the white iPhone.
Unless life also gives you sugar and water, your lemonade`s gonna suck!
I hope common sense is the next cool trend.