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Why do they waste so much money on all the checkout lanes at Walmart, when they only have two of them open at any given time.
i think lady gaga puts glue on herself, and rolls around random items.
White girls be like: I`ll have one triple mocha dark chocolate ugg boot raspberry white iphone 5 double caramel infinity sign frappe please.
Call me faithless, but I just can`t believe three guys would travel that far on camels to throw a baby shower.
Scientists are dumb. A meteor didn`t kill the dinosaurs. I`ve been to the museum. It`s obvious they starved to death.
I should eat more healthy, but we all saw how that whole apple thing went for Adam & Eve.
I can tell a police officer is gay by the way he writes me a ticket instead of letting me off with a warning.
If god can artificially inseminate someone, why did he need two of every animal on the ark to repopulate the world?
I know the voices ain`t really, but man, do they ever come up with some great ideas.
My favorite part about your rant on how much you hate social media sites was when you posted it from a social media site.
Absolutely is my favourite nothing to do...
I shake my bottled water so the H`s & O`s are evenly distributed.
I don’t know how many girls it takes to change a lightbulb but I guarantee you they’d post pictures of them doing it on Facebook.
I ordered myself an Eastern European bride online. SO EXCITED. Just received confirmation… My Czech is in the mail!
Nothing embarrasses a psychic more that throwing them a surprise party.