Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I got drunk last night and watched the most hilarious television show for hours until I sobered up and realized it was just a mirror.
I accidentally ran over my neighbour`s cat........... Nine times....... just in case
Give a fish something for once for f*cks sake
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Please drink responsibly this weekend and don`t drink and dri......Wait this is Facebook, most of you probably won`t leave the house! ... Good talk!
I think the golden rule for men should be, don’t say anything to a woman at work that you wouldn’t want another man to say to you in prison.
Some people just need to be clothes lined
Life is fun! You should get one.
I`m never free but I`m available.
Research shows that when someone shouts "Oh no he didn`t!" he infact did.
You´re never too old to learn something stupid.
Never argue with someone who knows fancier words than you. Like `responsibility`
The plural of beer is beer, which is very convenient when you are explaining to your wife why you were late coming home from work.
I`d rather be someone`s shot of whiskey than everyone`s cup of tea.
I`m getting really irritated. This is the tenth ATM I`ve been to in the last week that`s had "insufficient funds".