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What happens in Vegas never happens to me.
It is days like today that I am glad that we all don`t live in a Yellow Submarine. Well at least not in the same one.
I was about to read the story below. But it was too long.
I celebrate 4/20 on January 5th, because I know how to reduce fractions unlik the rest of you morons.
Don`t ever, ever EVER!!! Touch a crazy man`s food!!! I will STAB YOU WITH A SPOON!
Just once I’d like to see someone dropkick the guy grinning and waving behind the news reporter.
Facebook prank #23 Go in everynight and change your birthday to the next day...then see how long it takes for people to catch on....
If you`re camping and you have WiFi, you`re not camping.
I’ve been waiting 2 hours for an employee to come and wash my hands like the sign says….
Why am I always right but people still ignore me...?
Five little words that will win my heart, "I brought beer and pizza."
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
If I owned a copy shop, I’d only hire identical twins to work there.
I`m tired of being the better person. One day I`d like to be the b!tch they claim I am.
Imagine coming home from a long vacation and finding your bathroom towels are wet from just being used. I can do that to your ex if you want.