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I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
"Haha" - me when I don`t understand the reference
I`ve had like 10 red bulls, so of course I`m vacuuming the front yard.
For every bad idea you have, I’m always there to tell you…I’m in.
Apparently, you can only say "Look at you! You got so big!" to kids. Old girlfriends tend to get offended. Who knew?
I`m dreaming of a white Christmas. But if the white runs out I`ll pop open the red and drink that.
I don`t understand why you guys complain about never being able to finish a tube of chapstick, it usually only takes me 2 or 3 bites.
looong and hard, yep thats my pencil.
Who`s further now, the Energizer Bunny or Voyager 1?
Thanks for calling me to tell me you just sent that email
Been there, done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn.
Why can’t we all just get a Long Island Iced Tea?
Actually, when I went to New Orleans, I blacked out too.
Dance like no one´s going to put it on YouTube.
A secret is what you tell everyone not to tell anyone else.