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Somehow I thought growing up would involve more than staring at my phone
I`ve actually have come to the conclusion that some of today`s youth may actually believe "laughing out loud" is actually spelled "lol"
FACT: Candy corn is made out of melted down traffic cones.
The next time someone asks me what I`m doing, I`m gonna reply "I`m breathing 2 stay alive how about u"?
Just stepped outside, closed my eyes, took a deep breathe of fresh air, sipped a Dew. What a perfect morning, what could go wrong? Crap I forgot 2 put pants on!
I wish my personality allowed me to write deep and meaningful statuses sometimes, oh well. Titties!
So what if I`m single now ... I mean it can`t be that hard to boil toast, can it?
Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feel safe, so basically a clown ninja.
Health insurance is rare for exotic dancers. Most strippers have little or no coverage.
I hate brushing my teeth at night. It signifies I can`t have any more food and I`m never ready for that kind of commitment
All i ever see on facebook is LBR, TBH, LMS, and all that other crap...
Some people lack the ability to laugh at themselves ...That`s where I come in...
Love your enemies; after all, you made them!
Ladies, don`t date him just because his dad has a yacht. Date the dad.
I often worry about the safety of my children, especially the one that is rolling their eyes at me & talking back right now.