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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Urban Dictionary: Helping white folks figure out if they`re getting insulted or complimented daily.
You don`t get to complain about life until you move out of your parent`s house.
I don’t understand how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living.
The more I drink, the more I realize how much more I still want to drink.
You can`t fight Destiny. Because if you try to fight Destiny, then you have to fight the bouncers and the rest of the strippers too...
I`m not saying we should kill all the incompetent people. I`m simply suggesting we remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Facebook should just change it`s name to "People You May Want to Avoid."
Girl Scout cookie season is scientifically timed to occur just as people are giving up on their New Year`s resolutions.
You know its going to be a b!tch of a day when you put your bra on backwards and it fits better.
Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes that reason is that you`re stupid and make bad decisions.
You seem to be very educated on the things you make up.
I just made an emergency survival kit. You know, for emergencies. It looks like all my other kits, but don`t be fooled; this one is red and has more liquor.
24 astronauts were born in Ohio.....What is it about that state that makes people want to flee the Earth?
Hello, fire department? Is this Mr. February? Yeah, I`m stuck in a tree. Uh, I mean... meooow.