Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

A garbage disposal is just a device for finishing off all the food no one else in the house will eat.
Live life to its fullest even if that means eating everything in the fridge
I remember my single days like it was 11 years, 1 month, and 12 days ago.
I’m drinking because you’re talking.
F*ck It - My final thought before making decisions.
I don’t always have time to study, but when I do, I don’t.
I`ll make better mistakes tomorrow.
If it defies all logic, and makes very little sense then it was probably my idea...
I used to eat natural food, until I heard people were dying of natural causes
Whatever you do in life, always give 100%...unless you`re donating blood...
The Swiss must’ve been pretty confident in their chances of victory if they included a corkscrew in their army knife.
Never ask a Leper to "give you a hand", seriously, don`t........................
is sick and tired and tired of being sick and sick of being tired!
Facebook Proves: That if Family had the Option... they`d Delete ya.
I bet there are muppets that have thought about shanking Elmo.