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Bored? Update your Facebook to “in a relationship” with someone you’ve never met just to see if they’ll confirm.
Man, this Trojan gum I bought tastes terrible ... Blows amazing bubbles though
What do you call a woman with big breasts who doesn`t make sandwiches? A compromise.
The other day someone told me I could make ice cubes out of leftover wine. I was confused... What is leftover wine?
A synonym is a word you use when you can`t remember how to spell the other word.
"I love Justin bieber" well I love McDonalds but you don`t see me making an account pretending to be a f*cking chicken nugget do you...
Another World`s Oldest Man has died. This is beginning to look suspicious.
A slug is just a divorced snail.
It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married, right?
I`m pretty sure God just pointed at me and laughed.
What is this `wrong hole` you people speak of?
I know two wrongs don`t make a right, obviously. But how many does it take? I`m like on 756.
Slowly, Waldo`s wife and Mr. Sandiego started putting the pieces together.
If a cannibal ate a comedian, that would lead to some funny sh!t.
Celebrate Valentines Day responsibly, or you`ll be celebrating Thanksgiving in a maternity ward