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Haters are my motivators(:
Next time you over hear a stranger giving out their number. Text them details of what they are wearing. It`s so fun to watch them freak out!
Recipes sound good until you realize that you don`t have $846 worth of spices in your house.
Zebras are just horses that escaped from prison.
Paint thinner? I call bullsh!t. I been painting myself with it all week and I`m still fat.
I am addicted to Cold Turkey. Not sure how I will ever quit that one.
Maybe there`s no such thing as automatic doors, just gentlemen ninjas.
You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax and rich people can go to jail.
I`m high as a kite! Let me rephrase that: I`m stuck in a tree.
If ANY of my posts have made even one person’s day better, then there’s something seriously wrong with that person
I`ve upped my driving skills, no go Up yours!
Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes walking through the kitchen. Clearly my dog isn’t doing his part of the chores around here.
A dating site based on Netflix viewing compatibility.
There`s a pretty good chance I`ll end up being one of those senior citizens who randomly bites people...
I’m watching this show on stalkers, still haven’t seen any of you yet.