Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I cannot even begin to imagine the conversation that led to the first circumcision.
I’m trusting a whole lot of people not to randomly murder me throughout the day.
Facebook: Proving that just because you have an opinion doesn`t mean you should share it.
I used to drink a lot in the 80s. Then I realized, who cares what the temperature is?
is admitting to pushing Humpty Dumpty, he had it coming!!
I like my women how I like my straws …. Bendy and full of liquor.
All these people are talking about finding Jesus, finding love, finding themselves... I`m like I found 63 cents and four Fritos in the couch!
I`m Not Single. I am romantically challenged
If someone says they`ll always be there for you...make sure you find out exactly where "there" is.
"I want to marry a smart, rich, and beautiful woman. But I don`t feel like getting married 3 times." - Hesam Ebrahim
If people winked in real life as much as they do in texts, the world would be a really creepy place.
Its too damn early. Even the voices in my head are still snoring.
Why do people say ``I saw it with my own eyes." Do they sometimes use other peoples eyes?
Seriously, it’s almost 2014, can we please get some waterproof phones? I would like to text in the shower.
If you knew how many trips to the bathroom every phone has taken, you’d never, ever, ever, ever, ever touch somebody else’s phone. Ever.