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Next time you think life`s not fair..think of this x large clothes cost $2 more than large so why doesn`t small cost $2 less ? Being fat ....now that`s unfair
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called “fun sized” should really re-evaluate their standards for entertainment.
True laziness is being excited when plans get canceled.
Is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep?
You`ve got to be twins. You`re too stupid to be one person.
This generation is guilty of making the wrong people rich and famous.
If you don’t cuss when you drive you aren’t paying enough attention to the road.
Do you ever get the feeling that you`re being watched? Because if it`s bothering you, I`ll stop.
I bet people don’t understand that I’m joking 800% of the time.
I want the time management skills of people who effortlessly carve out entire hours to be offended by every single thing on the internet.
If Violets were Orange, poetry would be a lot more challenging.
I have removed all the unhealthy food from my house ... It was delicious.
I think it’s pretty cool how Chinese people made a language made entirely out of tattoos.
i made a chicken salad the other day. little bastard didn`t even eat it.
I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.