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I accidentally wore green today. And I probably will be drunk later but NOT because it`s St. Patrick`s Day, because it`s Monday.
Me- We need eggs. Hub- How many? Me- One. See if they will sell you just one.
If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
I don`t know where the saying "working like a dog" got started but I`m looking at my dogs daily routine feeling pretty jealous myself.
The first guy who bought pants had to go to the store without pants on, that`s just science
I`m lucky to be broke at a time when minimalism and sustainability are in style.
If you don`t boo at people after bad sex, how do you expect to motivate them to get better?
I finally got some "me time" being away from the kids. Two whole hours. Would have gotten more, but my knees started getting numb from crouching behind the dryer.
Facebook needs a "settle down" button.. You tap on a friend`s profile, that locks them out for a day so they can work through stuff privately..
When people say "To be honest...", it means that up to that point they`ve been lying.
I’m not a schizophrenic… At least, that’s what all the voices tell me.
Just how hairy was the dude who invented a shampoo called Head & Shoulders?
If you`re wondering about who the oldest James Bond was, don`t google `old man bond age`
Life is hard ... It`s harder if you`re stupid.
Apparently I misunderstood it when I was told to "expose yourself to other cultures."