Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`ve created a shoe made out of Legos, so when you step on Lego it doesn`t hurt. You just get taller.
The only correct answer to "Are you ticklish?" is "I have explosive diarrhea right now,"
Today is International Women’s Day. It was actually supposed to be held 2 days ago but they took too long to get ready.
How long does it usually take for a Happy Meal to start working?.... It`s been an hour.
When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone’s numbers again, I text them: “Guess who?” for 2 weeks.
You are here: X
Nothing ruins hump day like not getting humped.
Some of my best memories are naps.
I just realized that when I murder someone my neighbors will describe me as "quiet"
Does anyone have plans to stare at their phones somewhere exciting this weekend?
Speed bumps can turn into speed ramps depending on who`s car I`m borrowing.
Everyone’s beautiful on the inside. Some people just need a few good stab holes to let that beauty out.
I wouldn`t say I "missed" your call.
Every pair of panties can be a thong if your a$$ is big enough.
The only thing instant glue sticks to instantly is fingers.