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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

30 years later and my Cabbage Patch Kid still has no clue that he`s adopted.
I`ve decided to go my own way and think "inside the box" to be different ... Wow its dark in here!
You know why you like me ... Cause your f*ckin crazy too!!!
Memories of you make me look forward to alzheimers.
I`ll never understand why the guy that invented braille didn`t just put the dots in the shape of the actual letters.
The filling in this fortune cookies tastes like paper...
Shout out to good looking women who date unattractive men who aren`t rich, thanks for keeping hope alive.
"The Twilight Zone" makes me long for the days when you could smoke on a spaceship.
What’s the answer to this question?
I heard she was born naked!! That slut!
It`s that time of the evening where my beer bottle has magically turned into a microphone again.
I think my smart phone is making fun of me behind my back.
If I drove a UPS truck there’s a 100% chance I would fall out of the truck when I turned corners.
Is it bad when IΒ΄m talking to myself and IΒ΄m not even listening?
I`ve noticed that the squirrels are gathering nuts for the winter. Couple of my friends are missing...