Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ever since I heard that women have one breast bigger than the other, it`s given me another reason to stare.
Still waiting for a Discovery Channel "How It`s Made" episode on babies.
I`ve reached that time of day between "coffee wearing off" and "murdering my co-worker."
take me drunk i`m home
My inner self is in Photoshop
Humans are so stupid! This is why aliens probe us. They think our brains are up our butts.
When your girlfriend says do what ever you want. Do not do what ever you want!
How come know-it-alls don`t know how annoying they are?
Guess what I saw today? ... Everything I looked at.
I used to have a life. Then some idiot came along and said "Why don’t you make a Facebook account? It`s fun".
The guest of honour was a bit subdued. The Keyboardist was playing too softly for my liking. But it was a good turnout, lots of food and laughter. But break out into one choreographed `Thriller` dance routine and the crowd goes all apesh!t and tosses you out of the funeral home.
My mom just walked in and called me gay... If my nails weren`t drying i swear to God..
I’m holding cheerleader tryouts for my fantasy football team.
This post was going to be really funny but I didn`t write it down because I was totally sure I`d remember it.
Having kids puts a new perspective on life.