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You only live once.......Unless someone has a defribrilator
Whenever I see a hot girl on the streets I`m like HOLY CRAP I`M OUTSIDE.
Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.
Youβre the shampoo in the eyes of my life.
I sometimes ask myself, "What would Jesus do?", and then I think, Jesus wouldn`t be caught up in this sh*t.
Not all country music is terrible. If you can get past the lyrics about trucks, mud, farms and cows... It`s actually not too bad.
People should seriously stop expecting normal from me...We all know it`s never gonna happen
the `real` me doesnt do facebook
You had me at "I hate that b!tch too".
My favorite thing about naps is that I don`t have to talk to people during them
My lifetime stats are pretty average until you move over to the Pizza Consumed column.
Sometimes I wish my dog could talkβ¦then I remember all the things he has seen me do when Iβm alone.
Kim and Kanye have been married WAY longer then I expected.
I am really getting tired of every time I go out people use me for my body. You know, to shade them from the sun and all.
If you heard twenty minutes of moaning from my bedroom that was just me trying to stand up.