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Seeing a spider isn`t a problem. It becomes a problem when the spider disappears.
#Redskins QB Robert Griffin III back after surgery to reconstruct the ACL and repair the LCL in his right knee. He`s now RG 3.2
Why does the alphabet need to be in order anyway
According to the U.S. Census Bureau: 190,374 people are having sex right now, 212,130 are kissing, and 1 poor person is reading this post. You hang in there!
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
With the problems I have, I would have taken my own life a long time ago but i have one question: Do they sell weed in hell?
I have an alcohol problem, in that I can`t afford any.
I can walk up to any dog, rub its butt and make a friend. That trick only works about half the time on people.
The trouble with jogging is, that by the time you realize you`re not in shape, it`s too far to walk back.
A bachelor party seems more appropriate after a divorce than before a wedding.
Ya know what I really hate about mornings? People start talking to me!
I can think of other ways to eat fresh, but I`ll settle for this subway sandwich.
Ask not what your father can do for you, but what you can do for your father. Happy Fathers Day!
hell yeah !!!! i was the lucky sperm !!!!!
I don`t understand the saying "you snooze you lose"... I hit the snooze button 8 times this morning and feel like a champion.