Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Before the internet I used to like people.
Ever had sex while camping!? It`s intents!
I saved someone`s life today. Well, I resisted the urge to strangle the life out of some idiot. That`s the same thing, right?
I`ve never said "in all seriousness" and actually meant it.
I`m scared of the pesticides on this produce, so I guess I`ll run them under cold water for half a second
If the river were beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and never come up..
My lack of dusting will finally pay off on Halloween.
Just a reminder that you don’t have to tell Facebook goodnight. You can just stop talking.
about love
The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can be in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.
I wish Facebook would notify me when people deleted me, that way I could like it
A hot woman telling me about her boyfriend is like setting money on fire in front of a homeless person.
I plan on being up really late tonight making voodoo dolls for, well, never mind, you will know who you are soon enough.
I just realized we cook bacon and bake cookies, get it together English.
Are you still bored? Head over to Walmart, take a box of condoms to the checkout clerk, and ask where the fitting room is.