Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Teamwork is just another way of saying we will soon be sharing in the blame equally.
Remember when phones were stupid and people were smart?
Some of my ideas are about as profitable as selling YOLO T-Shirts at a Reincarnation seminar
Don’t ask me to kill a spider for you & then criticize my methods. Yes, I had to use a samurai sword, & no, I’m not sorry about your table.
i know how to shutup.I just don`t know when.
There was a glorious time, before social media, when you would just lose touch with people.
I have a black belt in leather
Warning: forgetting what pocket your keys are in may result in the Macarena.
To a musician, a g-string means something completely different than it does to me. .
I just found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in my mom’s bedroom. I can’t believe it.. She’s a superhero!
I like to think all pizzas are personal pizzas.
If you see a guy with no arms and your first thought is “My God how does he drink his beer??”, You might be an alcoholic.
"Be yourself" is about the worst advice you can give some people.
I think Labor Day is to remind people that after a full day with the family, going to work actually isn`t so bad after all.
Kids teach you so many life lessons. Unconditional love, patience, the meaning of family, but mostly to lock the bedroom door.