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No I don`t think you`re stupid, I just think you have real bad luck when it comes to thinking
Teenage girls hang out in odd numbered groups because they literally can`t even.
I`m sick to death of these letters from the City of College Station bullying me to mow my grass! If Walmat can prepare for Christmas 3 mths in advance why can`t I do the same for Easter!!!??
Girls here`s how to tell if a guy wants you for sex - 1: He does
I hate sharing popcorn with someone at the cinema and our fingers touch. Especially if I don`t know them, and they don`t know we`re sharing.
Someone`s gotta break it to people under 25 that cameras can also point away from themselves.
I only drink on two occasions; when its my birthday and when its not.
What if cell phones are part of an elaborate plot to rid the world of phone booths so Superman has nowhere to change?
You`d think that with as much time as women spend looking at their butt in the mirror they would be able to parallel park.
My worst ideas have all either started or ended with having no pants on.
Checked my bank balance at the ATM and was happy to see I had 707 dollars in it until I realized I was holding the receipt upside down and it said LOL instead.
How can I go to sleep when this movie I’ve seen 70 times just started?
Don`t feel bad, alot of people don`t have talent either
It`s always darkest before the dawn. So if you`re going steal your neighbor`s newspaper that`s be the time to do it.
If you take bites out of string cheese rather than rip strings off , you don’t f*cking deserve string cheese.